I faced my biggest fear this morning - the dentist. Sounds strange doesn't it. Been through and still on BC treatment, seeing the oncologist yearly, mammogram yearly, surgeon yearly, plus all that goes on with my diabetes. But my greatest horror is of the dentist. That is due to three awful experiences I have had, one as a small child, one as a teenager, and one only about nine years ago.
When I tell you that I was physically sick twice before I left the house, you can gauge the depth of my fear. However, two weeks ago I went to bed on a Saturday night as usual. I had cleaned my teeth as always, no problem. I got up at 5 a.m. to go to the toilet and my mouth felt funny. I could not make it out. I ran my tongue over my bottom teeth and felt something sharp, I thought I had something caught in them. I looked into the mirror and saw, to my horror, that half a bottom tooth had completely come away. I can only assume I swallowed it whilst alseep. It was split right down the middle and to gum level.
We contacted the dentist the next day, the one that Mike has been attending and thinks so highly of. So I decided to get on their books. We were both stunned to be told that their National Health funding had been reduced and although they could take me on, I would have to pay. How ridiculous that Mike is there on the NHS and this last lot of treatment is costing him nothing but I have to pay privately.
Anyway I made an appointment giving time for the pension to go through so today was the day. Mike had to come in the treatment room with me and hold my hand.
The dentist was very kind and understanding. I was prepared for lots of blood and gore. However, Eric, the dentist told me he could save the tooth for me, completely rebuild it. It would take a bit of extra time but if I would rather have that than a gap he would do it. I opted for that.
My mouth is still somewhat numb but my tooth is rebuilt and gleaming white. He said, all in all for a woman of my age my teeth are pretty good. I do have one tooth that is very discoloured due to an amalgam filling that I am very conscious of. He said when I feel up to it, he can remove that filling for me and replace it with a white one. It will not be totally the same but look much better than it does.
Anyway, I am so glad it is behind me and I did not have another horrific experience. The only bugbear being that we had to pay £145 to have it done.
It seems so long since I have done my journal but many of you know about my brother and the problems we have had there. Well, things have got even worse now.
Mike had that awful virus. He had to have antibiotics as his chest got infected. However, he is still left with an awful cough and feeling very under the weather, so last Wednesday he saw the doctor again. Another thorough medical. The doctor asked eventually if he was under any strain or whether something was getting him down. Mike told him about being at my brother's beck and call every day, the endless phone calls etc. The doctor said it had to stop, that Mike was not his carer and must put his foot down. If he did not, then his own health was going to deteriorate rapidly. After all Mike is only four years younger than my brother. So on medical advice, Mike knew it had to be nipped in the bud.
That night Mike bit the bullet and told my brother. There was an awful scene. It ended up with Mike throwing my brother' s house keys on the floor and telling him that was the end of it. My brother called him back, asked Mike to pick the keys up and keep them, to shake his hand and said they were not to part anything other than friends. So Mike did and that was that. It put an immediate end to the constant phone calls we were receiving.
However, I have faced a torrent of rage over Mike from my brother and other people have also been told that Mike was abusive, attacked him, used foul language, that Mike is not right in the head etc. etc. So we are having nothing to do with him at this time. He has upset so many people, driven so many away but he made the choice, he has made his bed and must lie in it.
Mike has to go back to the eye clinic when an appointment comes through as he is having trouble with the first eye they operated on. Also, clearing the wax from his ears did not help. He obviously has a hearing problem so is due at the hearing clinic next week. Probably means an aid but they are so small these days. He is not worried.
So, my poor journal has been neglected and I must also apologise that I have been neglecting you all as well and not commenting on your journals as I used to.
I hope things will all be back to normal in the near future.
At least the clocks change this month and the evenings will be lighter and hopefully we shall see some buds on the trees soon. It has been a long hard winter and it will be nice to see flowers and sunshine.
Have a good week, dear friends and readers.